So it started a bit ago when Willy D called the original Ching and asked the magic question.
"Chingon", Willy said, "when was the last time you needed air?" Air, I thought, shit! It's
been a while but certainly it was about time. "Needing air" is a term Willy developed when
we were in college.
It started one night when we were partying with Jim Avila in the LB.
Jim, the designated driver, had me in the front with Willy picking up the rear. We
parked in Jims driveway and immediately the magic words were said. "Uhhhh!, Willy grunted,
I need air!" "Air, I asked, Ya need air holmes?" Then I realized what was happening,
Willy was going to blowup big-time. Drunk as hell, I proceeded to reach to the drivers
console trying to roll up the rear window, but this didn’t stop him. He made it out of the
car and killed it. Seconds later it was over, Willy got back into the car as if nothing
happened and history was made. Thus the term "needing air" was born. Since then there have
been many times where we've needed air when Willy was on Termino street. Thinking back it
almost became a regular occasion. Good Times!
We decided the need for air was long overdue. Willy mentioned a wonderful idea. He said,”
Chingon, lets get some air on high-end shit". I thought to myself, what a fucking
excellent idea and the ball started to roll.
Our preferences have become refined over the years so we decided to research
high-end Scotches and Whiskeys. I spoke with Rusty, who tends the bar at a Marriott resort
in North Scottsdale when I travel on business. I asked about the higher-end Scotches that
he served and an ear to ear grin appeared instantly. He explained that the customers enjoy
"neat" drinks like the Glenlivich, Glenfiddich, and others. Then he mentioned a blended
Scotch costing a hefty $40 a shot that was brand new at the bar, it was Johnny Walker
Blue Label. I thought to myself, Johnny Walker sucks!
This was because I had rocked some single and doubles of red and black label
which is the equivalent to urine. Anyway, Willy and I contacted a couple of reputable liquor
stores and started to ask some more. Distilleries like Lagavulin and Macallan were discussed
and I knew we were getting closer to a decision. Personally, I found it impossible to purchase
anything along the lines of Glen this and Glen that because first the cost was simply too common.
Second, if I'm going to barf it's going to be high-end shit that’s at least over a
bengie in cost, not some $60 bottle of butt sweat. Then I was humbled! I learned that the
Macallan 30 year was about $600 dollars which for two people is a little steep considering
this was our first experience shopping for high-end shit. Finally, we came to a happy
medium. We decided to get into the Johnny Walker Blue Label at $200 per bottle. We felt
confident about our purchase since "the man" at Morrys of Naples said there was no way we
could go wrong.
The Friday finally came, I was driving my street legal rally car
 to Willys
and a thought came to my mind. I became concerned! Fuck, I told myself, I hope when I
need air I make it to the restroom! Memories filled my mind when I remember needing
air and never making to the toilet fast enough. That wasn’t the only the thing I was
concerned about. The second issue I had was "it". What is "it" might you ask? Chicken.
Chicken along side with special hand signals mean only one thing. It means are you a
pussy? Is something wrong with you? The last thing I wanted to see or hear about was
Willy busting chicken on me. With that said I knew I had to man up.
The plan was this; we were going to play it safe and stay at Willys and watch a couple of
classic movies. Every time a curse word was said the plan was to take a shot. We popped in
Blazing Saddles, then Cannonball run and the rest was history. The photos
tell the whole story. Enjoy. Can you guess what happened?
We have another high-end session planned already. Next stop high-end Cognac, otherwise
known to the Brohams as "Yak". We are planning to rock some Pierre Ferrand Excellence ($
299/750ml per bottle), which has been aged for fifty long years. Another choice might be
Pierre Ferrand Ancestrale 1er Cru De Cognac Grande Champagne ($390/750ml). Only 200 bottles
are released each year. Finally, the highest quality Cognac on the market today, Louis XIII
has been carefully tended by three generations of Rémy Martin cellar masters. This bottle
sells for roughly $1500 dollars at Morrys of Naples. When we feel like it me and Willy will
surely pound this style of "Yak" (Winston Churchill got faded off this when we won his
election) Stay tuned.
-- O.G. Chingon
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